Mark your Calendars!!! On Monday, April 8, a solar eclipse will be visible across the entire continental United States and most of Canada.

A solar eclipse occurs when the moon blocks any part of the sun, and with this one, the vast majority of North America will experience at least a partial eclipse.

A lucky few million people along a path from Texas to Kentucy to Ohio to Maine and eastern Canada will experience a brief total eclipse when the moon completely blocks the sun for up to 4 minutes. During this time, it will look like dusk along that path.

This total eclipse will make the solar corona visible, and stars and the planets may also be visible during this...

  1. Why did the guy try to avoid eye surgery by rubbing ketchup in his eyes?  He had heard that Heinz sight was 20/20.
  2. Patient: “Doc, I get a stabbing pain in my eye every time I take a sip of coffee."  Doctor: “Have you tried taking the spoon out of the mug?"
  3. What do you call a penguin with no eye?  A pengun!
  4. At what elevation is your vision the best?  See Level.
  5. Why don’t optometrists use tape measures?  They’re really good at eyeballing it.
  6. What did the eyeball say to the eyelid?  "I wish you wouldn't keep me in the dark!"
  7. Why did the pirate walk into the bar?  He had his patch on the wrong eye.
  8. Cop: “Let me know if you see the suspect with one eye.” Bystander: “I...